STOP THE CROP TOPS MOVEMENT!

I understand that it can be difficult not to conform in this society...especially living as young women for Christ. I understand that some of the clothes that we see in the stores at the malls can sometimes be appealing or attractive to us, but that doesn't necessarily mean that those clothes are appropriate for us to wear out in public.

We have to remember that our bodies are the temple for the Holy Spirit. In all that we do, we want to bring glory to our Heavenly Father.

It's breaks my heart seeing our sisters in Christ (some believers and unbelievers) dress in a way that allows the opposite sex to lust after them. It breaks my heart that 1. some young women aren't aware of how they're dressing and the wrong signals that it's giving off and 2. some young women know exactly what they're getting into. They know exactly how they look. They like to wear the tight clothes with the booty shorts and with their stomachs exposed. It bothers me a lot, because I just want to tell every young woman out their that they are so beautiful and that they don't have to show all of their goods to get attention from males. I want them to see their worth for what it really is. I want to see the beauty inside of themselves.

I wrote this spoken word in hopes that young women will see that what they're doing to their bodies is not okay. That it's not okay to dress like promiscuous women. It's not okay for men to lust after their bodies like a piece of meat. I want them to see that there are standards that should be set. I want them to see that they are worth so much more than they could even fathom.

So, I am asking you and every other girl out there to take part in this movement and make a point to STOP THE CROP TOPS.

I want this to be a promise that me, you, we, us make between God and ourselves that we will honor, cherish, respect, and love our bodies. I want us to take in all accounts that we are daughters of the King and that we, therefore, should live up to such a wonderful title. Let's show God that we adore Him and obey Him in mind, body, spirit, and truth. So, next time you are tempted to wear an item of clothing that is a little too revealing, remember the promise you made to God and the paper you signed with you signature saying that you will honor your body.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 "Do you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."

Below is the link to the promise:
*Print it out and hang it on your mirror as a reminder to you every day (:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/15wtkRu84eVIB8nsFOfneo6-2CIp3IkbCS19Sb8PmOP4/edit?usp=sharing

Here is Stop The Crop Tops Spoken Word:

What's More Important?

When it comes to choosing a college, or for parents, when it comes to helping pick out a school for your child, what's more important for them to have? Spiritual growth or academic growth? In most instances, many parents would say that they want their kid to have a healthy balance of growing in their faith and having the best academia world there is. So, what happens when (in the parent's viewpoint) there's only one option to choose from? Do you choose the "lesser" school that has an incredible organization that can help your kid grow deeper with Christ, or do you choose the school that is moving up in rankings just so they can have a "secure" future? In a utopian society, both would be great, but realistically speaking, there's only one option, unless one just knows of a school where there's both involved. If so, great, but for this post, there's only one option.

Currently, I feel as though I'm in that situation where I'm at this "prestigious" school that's known for its small, quaint, liberal arts education where it's almost embedded in every student to speak their mind, to speak up for themselves. In all honestly, I feel like I'm not at college, but rather in a boarding school for all girls that's only less than an hour away from home. (That's besides the point). Anyway, I look around and I see many girls who, I'm guessing, want to do something with their life. Maybe. Maybe not. I'm surrounded by girls who are highly about LGBTQ (something like that), and girls who like to party, smoke, and drink, and girls who just have filthy mouths, especially when it comes to the subject of boys and the usage of their precious bodies. I am not judging anyone here. I accept them all. I love them all. I am simply trying to make a point. No, not all of the girls are like that, but the vast majority that I have seen, are. (I'm just stating my opinion). I feel alone here. I feel lost, and spiritually hungry. Spiritually empty. Granted, there is one or two christian clubs, one that I'm apart of. But, there are certain levels of growth that all christians experience. I seem to be in the in-between stage: I'm not a baby-christian anymore...I know the basics, but I'm also, not up there with let's say Joyce Meyer or Francis Chan lol. Not that I aspire to be like them, it's just for illustration purposes. I seem to be stuck right in the middle where I'm just little ole me. Little ole Ayanna, desperately searching and looking for something more. Yes, I still pray and spend time with God. Yes, I journal. But, I'm looking for that intense growth that helps me and guides me in becoming all who God wants me to be. I want to be trained on how to be a discple. I want to be involved with a group of people, not just my peers, but older adults who are mature in the faith who can mentor and help me. I can't walk this walk alone.

It's hard. It's very hard. And most, if not every day, is very lonely. What I'm looking for, I don't have here. Yes, I have the academics, but is it really all that it's cracked up to be if you're spiritually dead inside? Of course, I see the perfect opportunity for God to use me as His vessel to witness and love on all of these girls around me, but there comes a time where you get burnt out. Where you get weak. Who do you turn to when that happens? To others who don't know me, my life, or my walk? I could potentially go to the girls in the christian club I'm in, yet still, I don't fit in with them either.

This post isn't me throwing a pity party or me complaining about this or that, I'm just trying to make a point and use my life as an example. Would a parent really take the risk in sending their child to a "lesser" school and have the ability to know that they will come out just as spiritually sound and strong as ever? Where's the priority?

To anyone of you beautiful girls that are in the transition of trying to find a college that is best for you, and you care about growing in your faith in Christ, my advice to you is that you try to find somewhere in the middle, a balance. But, if you can't find that, I say pray about your decision on where you should go to school, which should first be done before taking any action. Follow God's guidance. But most importantly, find and/or choose the school where you know you'll be able to flourish as a young soldier in the Lord's Army. Choose a place where they have spiritual, genuinely, Biblical support that will help you in your transition with school, adult life, and spiritual life. It is essential to have that when you're starting out. No, I'm not saying academics aren't important, I'm just trying to convey that you need to be spiritually sound and spiritually challenged wherever you go. You're going to need help in your walk and know that you cannot do it alone. Jesus knew that, that's why we are called the Body of Christ. That's why we have brothers and sisters in Christ. It's always great to strive to do your best, to strive for excellence and achieve greatness, in which you should because we are children of the King, but just be aware about where you want to go and what's really important in your life, and most importantly, be aware about what God is calling you to do. Because if He's saying go this way or go here, go. No matter what people say. (I know it's WAY easier said than done, trust me, but God gives us grace).

Just remember that, in the end, only what we do for Christ will last.

Stay beautiful.

Ayanna

"Little Miss Christian" VS. "A Heart To Live For Christ"

Someone once told me that I try so hard to be "little miss christian" when in fact, I try hard in not being that. Instead, I try hard in being the best I can be...I try hard in being who God wants and created me to be. There's a distinct difference between putting on a front for Jesus and actually getting behind Jesus with all of your brokenness and hope and allowing Him to shine through you. There's a distinct difference, and I, identify with the latter.
It's very difficult, even sometimes, hurtful when other people, who don't know your walk, call you names or blame you for being a hypocrite when in reality, you're just trying to live the best you can for Jesus. You mess up. You make mistakes. You try not to judge and you never try to come off perfect. It hurts and it stings...but in order to combat that negativity, you just have to keep letting Jesus' light shine through you and keep trusting HIM that people may see that it is Jesus who lives inside of you and not your flesh.

How can we make the difference between being "Little Miss Christian" and actually making sure we have a heart to live for Christ? See, it's easy to point fingers at other people. It's easy to say that that person over there isn't really a Christian, or that person shouldn't call herself a Christian, or even that person just goes to church but really she doesn't know Jesus at all by the way she's acting. Truthfully, unless we were asked to help keep that person accountable or they have allowed for us to see what they go through privately, then we cannot say that that person isn't truly living for Christ. Instead of over-evaluating other people, let's evaluate ourselves. "For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." Matthew 7:2. Therefore, we always want to make sure how we're treating others. Are we truly trying to lift up our brothers and sisters in Christ or are we waiting for them to fall so we can say "I told you so" or "I knew you weren't really right with Christ"? Why would we want to treat others so harshly? We have to remember the same way that we talk about people, and judge people is the same way we will be judged by God. We have to be very careful, because just as easy as it is to say a mean comment, it is just as easy to break someone's spirit.

Now, we have to evaluate ourselves. Why do we find ourselves thinking negatively about someone else? Why are we so quick to judge others? Why are we so quick to break another's spirit with our harsh, emotional, heated words? Could it be because we see something in that person that we too, hate to see in ourselves? Could it be that you hate to see the sin inside of you so much that actually seeing it in action infuriates you and you want it to vanish because it reminds you of your very own skeletons in your closet?

We shouldn't be so caught up in being a "perfect Christian". There is no perfect Christian. There is only one perfect man who ever lived, and His name is Jesus. We shouldn't get so caught up in how long we've prayed, or how many times we've went to church this week. What really matters is if we've cried out to God in our personal time and repented and asked for forgiveness. What really matters is if we've fellowshipped with Christ. What really matters is if we're allowing God to flow in us.

A lot of times, we forget that having humility is the best thing to obtain. The best thing to be. Humble. Being prideful is a very dangerous place for you, me, or any of us to be. We always have to be mindful of whether our true heart intentions are of "entitlement" or if they are born out of a servant's heart. Because if we feel like we worship more than others, know more than others, act better than others, then we can find ourselves being labeled under the category of "Little Miss Christian". And that's never a place we want to be. We want people to acknowledge Jesus inside of us rather than others acknowledge the works of our flesh that will remain futile.

I also understand that some people will call you "Little Miss Christian" or a hypocrite because they are blinded by the truth or that they may even feel intimidated by you. Often times, people are watching us very closely, and so when they find us having a not so good day and we slip up, they are quick to tell us that, we're hypocrites, that we shouldn't even claim the name of Christian. I get it. We make mistakes. We even sin on purpose, but we realize our wrong doings, and we get back into fellowship with Christ. There is a distinct difference between thinking that one can do "good" all by themselves and thinking that they can't do it by themselves, so they allow Jesus to step in.

The person who can first be honest with God and then themselves will start to see freedom in their hearts. They will start to see freedom from the feeling of thinking they have to be entitled to something all of the time. They will start to see themselves being able to address heart issues more clearly because they are starting to evaluate the true intentions of their heart.

We may not be able to stop others from telling lives and speaking negativity over us, but we do have the power in Jesus' name to rebuke the devour and anything that tries to attack us. We may not be able to stop others from hurting us or breaking our spirits or calling us hypocrites or whatever else, but we can stand true to the Word of God. We can allow God to be the example through us and we can allow God to do all of the work for us.

If we are careful enough to seek out Christ daily, despite having messed up, despite having intentionally sinned...if we get down on our face and cry out to God and repent, He will help us. He will show us the way. If we pay attention to what's really going on inside of our hearts, we can stop ourselves from becoming "Little Miss Christian" before someone else has the nerve to even claim that over our lives. But, instead, we can proclaim that we are children of God and that we will daily die to our flesh and ask Christ to helps us be a lover after His own heart. He will help mold our hearts into servant's hearts.

We don't have to do it alone. We don't have to fight alone. We don't have to hurt alone. He's there.

So, the next time someone wants to call you falsely out of your name...tell them the truth: "No, I am not perfect. No, I don't always get everything right. And yes, sometimes I do act out of my character, but I am a child of God, and I try my hardest to live for Him. He loves me and He forgives me and I will work to be who He has called me to be every day." We don't owe man an explanation of ourselves. What truly counts is what we think of ourselves, what we think of God, and what God thinks of us.

If you feel tired and worn out by life, pressures, and negativity, I'll give you one thing that Jesus said himself; "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30.

Jesus loves you...don't let others bring you down. Keep your joy. Keep chasing after Jesus and you will be just fine.

Never forget that you are beautiful beyond compare.

Ayanna

D.O.B Website!

Hello lovely ladies!

There is some exciting news!

Depths of Beauty now has a website! You should totally check it out if you like the blogposts that are written here!

www.ayannatillman.wix.com/depthsofbeauty

I believe that God is faithful and as time progresses and I stay in close standing with Him, He will continue to show me the direction He wants this blog...this ministry to go in. Although, I don't post regularly, I am constantly thinking about y'all.

In the meantime, let's make a point to work hard in our every day lives and keep striving after Jesus the hardest we can. He's with us! So we cannot give up!


Stay beautiful!

Ayanna